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Dark Souls 2

The Souls series is like weight training, callisthenics for the thumbs. You work at it, trying, failing, and trying again, gradually building toward a grace and confidence can only come with practice. You raise your hands triumphantly at vanquishing a troublesome boss, casting about for a high-five in what you suddenly remember is an an empty room, and your joy fading as you realise that the very next step in your journey is to progress from the known to the unknown. Effectively, you are constantly expected to trade-in your confidence for another chance to fumble in the dark. Dark Souls 2 continues in this vicious tradition, delivering an experience that is more about managing background anxiety than it is about chasing the carrot on a stick upon which so many other games rely.

I approached my time with the PC version of Dark Souls 2 with trepidation.

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The Elder Scrolls Online Grabnadz

Playing as an orc named ‘Grabnadz’ has been my fond MMO tradition ever since the days of Warhammer Online, and so it was — after enjoying my time as a lizardman in the beta — I immediately jumped at the chance to recreate my favourite green-skinned murderer in the world of Tamriel. Grabnadz is usually a tank of some kind, but this time around I decided to see just how far I could push TESO’s weapon/class flexibility by becoming some sort of mage-tank.

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Watch Dogs

There’s any number of clichés that can be called to mind to help us deal with the disappointment of delay. From the tried and tested “everything comes to those who wait” to Shigeru Miyamoto’s oft quoted philosophising that a delayed game will eventually be good — but a bad game will always be bad.

Neither of these maxims are guaranteed to be true, of course – there are plenty of examples of the wait not paying-off or a delayed game that ends up being both late and rubbish – but Ubisoft will be hoping that they ring true when it comes to Watch Dogs. Having recently taken a peek at the upcoming action adventure title, I can report that its ambitious open-world holds a mixed bag of familiar shortcomings and tantalising tastes of freedom.

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I hate guns. Hate them. I often sit around thinking about how America has 99 problems and the gun is a big one. They know it, too. Obama wants to take those guns away, just ask the internet. The people cling to their grammatically unsound Constitution and cry, “How will we protect our homes tho Bamms?” It’s hard not to sit there and go, “Fair call. If there’s a home intruder, all bets are off – but why does it need to be a lethal killing stick? Why not replace everyone’s guns with phasers set to ‘stun’?” They’re bad, don’t like ‘em. I play a lot of shooters though, and I love shooters. I love shooting all them things. Uh?

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Recent Features
Dark Souls 2

Dark Souls 2 PC reviewed: The sweet reprise of death

Jason Imms dies over and over to bring you the skinny on the PC version of Dark Souls 2.

The Elder Scrolls Online Grabnadz

The Elder Scrolls Online journals: One giant, kinda laggy leap for orc-kind

Levels one through fifteen of The Elder Scrolls Online are demolished by an angry orc mage-tank.

Watch Dogs

Watch Dogs PC hands-on: Not the perfect open world, but still a world of fun

Watch Dogs offers a generous array of options, and we push the boundaries to see how far we can go.


Heroes of the Storm: Blizzard’s Dustin Browder on rage problems, hybrid roles, and balance

"We’re trying to make it so if there’s something obvious that you want to do, it’s the right thing to do. There’s no sort of hidden rules or hidden strategies that make that wrong."


ArcheAge’s alpha impressions: The freeform Korean MMO that might just live up to its promises

This high-flying Korean MMO has finally made it to a Western release. James jumps in to see if the promise 'sandpark' model delivers.

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GreenManGaming MREC

The Regulars

Sitrep: Hating Guns and Totally Loving Playing With Guns

Toby's absent-minded shower thoughts arrive for your edification.

The Secret World

Legal Opinion: Bait and switch… with a mankini

Not everybody is laughing following Funcom's April Fools joke on its players.

Bad at Aiming

Sitrep: Waiting in line at the FPS dole queue

Toby is so incompetent that he needs an entire new genre of games invented just to cater for him.

Amazon Fire

Friday Tech Roundup (04 April 2014): Radeon R9 295X2 specs leak

Also, the man behind the "Microsoft" phone scam has been captured and fined.

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