Toby is the worst shot in the world -- so why did it take him so long to discover the amazing power of the shotgun?
By Toby McCasker on June 18, 2014 at 11:49 am
My lack of online aim is pretty legendary. If my squad could take my guns away and pat me on the head they would. I’ve even had DMs from random players who are like, “Bro u NEED an aimbot lul.” That’s an actual quote from a guy I got the drop on and only managed to tag once or twice… with an entire clip.
For people to actively notice you can’t shoot straight in the middle of things exploding and everyone dying? That’s embarrassing. Alone and drunk, I wandered the streets, looking for a sign. Hours upon hours of doing the only thing I’m qualified to do (absolutely killing walls) had gifted me with a surprise new killing stick: A shotgun.
I usually avoid these things, and have never used them in multiplayer. The short range (of most of them) means I can’t do my favourite survival trick that doesn’t work (running away mid-firefight), and those agonisingly slow reload times. I like being Zippy McCrapshot, you know? But I could hear people in Japan laughing demurely at me so I thought, let’s lock ‘n load this new boomstick. Nothing to lose. Does dignity go into the negatives? If so then yeah you’ve got stuff to lose but still. Cha-chik.
And abject annihilation unlike any I had ever engineered began in earnest. Nobody was spared.
You don’t even have to aim with these things! You just wave ‘em at folk and then girls come to your house later. Amazing. OK, so I have this tendency to go heavy on the trigger and unload the whole basket o’ shells at one person (and this usually kills someone else randomly as well, which feels very good). That means a lot of dreaded shottie reloading, the worst of all reloading. I uh, did not realise this, but: You can start shooting again mid-reload. Haha, excuse me, I just drooled and orgasmed.
The hardest part that wasn’t actually that hard: Adapting my playstyle. Years and years of playing it coy because my aim skills had long received a majority vote of No Confidence (I voted for that too) means getting in people’s faces was a bit uncomfortable. For about two seconds. Once you realise most players freak out like cats with tape on their backs when they run smack into a hail of buckshot, you realise: I AM HOLDING ALL THE CARDS. AND THEY ARE MOSTLY DEATH CARDS. LITERALLY DEATH, LIKE, NOT EVEN TAROT SYMBOLISM FOR CHANGE.
Once bit, twice unable to shoot back at you, that’s what I’ve noticed. I could get used to this (I have already). My K/D is the best it’s ever been. It’s the kind of high-risk, high-reward way of rolling that I can get with, Spice Girls-style. Basically, gun-to-gun, you win. But then you have to run away and hide in a corner feverishly shoving rounds into your thing before leaping back out into the fray again.
I’m surprised I don’t see more players using them but then, there’s a kind of relentless madness to using a shotgun that, I imagine, invariably turns men into beasts. I had already been driven to the brink by the tyranny of distance. Conventional loadouts made me this way.