Sitrep: Far Cry 3′s Animal Hordes Strike Back

Far Cry 3

By on December 5, 2012 at 6:42 pm

So last week I thought it would be hilarious to put together a whimsical article charting the horrible demises of all gamingdom’s wonderful, unsuspecting creatures off the back of your outrage. Ha, yes, see those digital goats burn. Man is dominant. Destroy. Metaaal.

Some of you did not find this funny in the slightest and have yet to forgive me. I consoled myself by playing loads of Far Cry 3, and I’ve realised that gaming’s animal kingdom has not forgiven me, either.

“Who is the real monster here?” cry its leopards and tigers from the undergrowth I hunker in, silenced sniper rifle in hand, watching, waiting for the perfect time to strike that there red-flagged outpost in the short distance. Soon the perfect time arrives, and I miss it because I’m dodging tigers and leopards. So I have to make do with the imperfect time to strike, and I do, and then this happens:

I have never, ever played a game where I’m genuinely more fearful of the animals, for Christ’s sake, than all the guys with guns and grenades. I now flatly refuse to spend more than a few seconds in any river. I just can’t do it. Those crocodiles, man. They make no sound. Then they have you in a deathroll and it’s all you can do not to become a sloppy croc borry some hours later.

Likewise the goddamn tigers. Venturing off the beaten track is terrifying because of these majestic assholes. There you crouch, hidden from view and lining up the shot to end all shots on some meandering g goon yapping about his chlamydia, when you hear it. What sounds like a yawn so chesty it could inhale the skin from your bones. You peek over to the left or right, ever so carefully, and there he is. Tiger man. Sniffing for you.

You have to exist in a state of perpetual terror as man VS. beast quickly becomes man very averse to beast. It’s kind of worse

Killing and skinning enough of them, I thought, was a missed opportunity on the part of Ubisoft: You’ll net the “Poacher” trophy, which is worth something. I thought it should’ve been worth nothing, and that’s a little statement I’d have been pretty happy with. Instead, you have to exist in a state of perpetual terror as man VS. beast quickly becomes man very averse to beast. It’s kind of worse.

I’ve become so scarred by Far Cry 3’s jungle pantheon that, last night, I reached an absolute personal gaming low. Moments after liberating a base from Vaas’ henchmen, the predatory peals of a leopard still trapped in its bamboo cage tapped into an over the top instinct I’m pretty sure has been cultivated solely by this game. I did a mad pirouette, brandished my RPG, and sent a rocket crashing into a caged animal. I wouldn’t even go near the result until the smoke had cleared just in case it was some kind of cyborg leopard.

I am imagining cyborg leopards. Are you happy now, Ubisoft?

Tags: ,
33 comments (Leave your own)

nice piece Toby, Iv’e been eaten by Tigers twice, sharks 3 times and I ain’t looking forward to meeting a bear; I did manage to kill a boar with a knife but I thought it was a pig and I needed a new wallet so I was tad desperate. Wildlife in this game certainly don’t take a back step, lol.

 

I had 3 Komodo Dragons clear and capture a base for me. I didn’t move or fire a shot! They seem to really crave the taste of human flesh be it pirate or Brody meat.

An animal Colosseum would be great. I’d like to see which one would reign supreme. It will then be thrown into a pool of crocodiles.

 

How do you get animals to do that, Zan? My game irrepairably crashed during the second dream sequence so I have to reinstall.

 

Whilst having animals is cool and all, there’s a stupid amount of them shoehorned into the game. Leopards AND tigers AND bears? Not to mention they’re slightly bulletproof…

 

CYBER LEOPARDS. Someone, please, make that a thing.

I’ve been playing the game pretty constantly. Nearly at the end. And I can just say, IT GETS WORSE.

The path of the hunter missions become flat out terrifying. Think they’re bad now? I recently had to enter a mangrove swamp armed only with a machete, to kill an albino crocodile.

My hunting style? Jump at the bastard thing and stab it to death while it death rolled me. It was a moment to make Steve Irwin proud.

Otherwise, whenever I see a tiger, or bear, I crack out the AMR and one shot the bloody thing to hell. For the komodo, I use the Bull. So far, I’ve managed to avoid any creature deaths.

But the SHARKS. Oh dear god, the sharks terrify me. I start to shake when I go near the ocean. I know they are there. I know, each time I go in the water, one is going to be coming for me. I swim frantically for the shoreline, as fast as I can, hearing Jaws music all the way… I leap out, turn around, dripping and terriftied, and there is nothing there.

But the one time, the ONE time I relax, I know whats coming for me. 500 pounds of bull shark, teeth designed to saw and rip through flesh, a shark that prefers to maim rather than kill, which hunts in packs that literally tear people into pieces while they are still screaming. At least Great Whites have the decency to kill you quickly. The bull doesn’t. I HATE that damn thing.

 

I’m starting to develop a fear of the cassowary, been killed by them twice. The first time i didn’t think it would kill me so i tried to knife it. The second time I’m pretty sure i got out smarted by one.

The first tiger I came across I pulled out the bow lined it up for the headshot, 3 seconds later i was dead.

The wildlife really does make this game great.

 

Haha so hilarious and true i suffer a similar problem and instead of an RPG it was two grenades and i ran away. good post.

 

Fire is all you need

 

Flamethrower + Bull shotty. Enough said.

 

please, PLEASE tell me you can climb trees in this game.

 

zombywolf,

Nope. There is no escape. No sanctuary. No refuge. They know when you are weakest and they will find you. In the dark. And eat you.

 

The entire handling of animals in FC3 is one big, bad joke. It is all well and good to collect skins to create appropriate item but they rarely are at all appropriate or even related. 1x Pig Hide => 3x Pig Hide => 2x Leopard Skin => 1x Black Panther Leather to upgrade my syringes? 1x Pig Hide => 2x Cassowary Leather => 2x Shark Skin => 1x One Horn Buffalo Hide to upgrade my wallet? An ENTIRE buffalo hide is required for one and TWO shark skins for the lesser! Not to mention that the last hide is (usually) from an incredibly rare variety of the species and you are usually asked to seek it out for nothing more than shits-and-giggles. Not to worry yourself though, once you have wiped out all of the rare and endangered animals on the island you will receive missions asking you to slaughter four leopards because one leopard killed a human; or other missions just as stupidly ignorant.

The only thing more horrifying than the above is how Ubisoft have quelled any guilt or remorse for the disgusting actions that it requests from a normal play-through: by making the animal AI hypo-aggressive and in massive numbers. There is a section of the north island that is teeming with komodo dragons and these monitors roam the land with such an acute ferocity that the locals scream in horror if they spot one in the distance. When one of these gets close it charges, latches on and, in most cases, will kill the NPC unlucky enough to be in the way. There is no typing error, I meant a komodo dragon. The massive lizards that will either piss-bolt when it sees you or hisses at you if you get to close (which is lizard for “…and what’s Fonzie like?”). This is how any animal that has the capacity to be aggressive, behaves in FC3.

Ubisoft are creating their own ‘Jaws Effect’ and it is not going to reap good things…

 

Lol pinothyj , i love reading your shit….

 

In Metal Gear Solid 3 there were Indian Gavial Crocodiles, a critically endangered species. The Gavials in this game were particularly belligerent possibly as a side effect of atomic testing in the region.
Do you think maybe all the animals in Far Cry 3 are pissed off because they’re all high on some sort of plant that grows on the island or something?

 

pinothyj,
Meanwhile in the review thread, complaints about how bad it is to kill virtual animals….

Maybe they will do something in a patch to… oh, wait, its Ubisift. There games are perfect from the start.

 

Nothing wrong with defending yourself against big cats, but last night I found the game’s new low. I activated the predator pack unlock, which adds extra rare animals to hunt. One of them is a Thylacine. That’s right. You can find, kill and skin the extinct Tasmanian goddamn Tiger. Too far I say. Too far.

 

You do realise these are pixels right? They’re not real in any shape or form except that they look like their real life counter-parts. I doubt anyone who kills a tiger in this game with a machete is going to go out in the jungle armed with a machete and try take down a tiger for shits and giggles, and even if someone did, 99% sure they’re going to get eaten.

But of course,they’re almost extinct which makes it morally wrong to shoot a pixel gun at a pixel tiger for some reason, according to you.

 

pinothyj,

to be fair, jason is a tard and only uses a handful of any animal he slaughters ;)

 

The other thing to note is these Tigers, Leopards and Bears aren’t hunting the other creatures for food, they are nasty little “kill for the sake of killing” animals. I’ve watched more then one of them hunt down and kill 3 or more different animals one after the other, just for the sake of doing it.

So I figure, if they can just kill for the sake of killing so can I. Of course I’ve yet to see a Tiger jump into a jeep and chase a human down and ram him no matter that doing so will not only take out their target but also propel themselves and the jeep they are in over the cliff…. which I may have done myself at one time.

That’ll teach ‘em!

As for what others have said about the fear it strikes, I certainly know that fear. If I have to dive deep into the ocean to find some relic, I make sure I have a boat first, bugger the Jet ski (you can’t shoot from a jet ski), then before I dive in I use the Hunter Instinct syringe, scan the area for sharks, shooting any if they are around and then dive straight for my target and then high tail it out of there and scramble back into the boat because those sharks just bloody know when you aren’t looking.

Whole legions of privateers or pirates don’t scare me, but the sharks and the crocs scare the crap out of me.

And finally, when you do see a caged animal in the one of the outposts, silently shoot the cage and the animal will be free to run… and kill any opponents within range and if you are lucky will distract them enough for you to sneak in disable the alarm and take out those who aren’t focused on you.

You and me Tiger… what a team!

Although now I will have to kill you and skin you. But, I will wince and comment about how disgusting it is just to show you that I only do it because I need to do it.

 

subw00fer:
You do realise these are pixels right? They’re not real in any shape or form except that they look like their real life counter-parts. I doubt anyone who kills a tiger in this game with a machete is going to go out in the jungle armed with a machete and try take down a tiger for shits and giggles, and even if someone did, 99% sure they’re going to get eaten.

But of course,they’re almost extinct which makes it morally wrong to shoot a pixel gun at a pixel tiger for some reason, according to you.

‘Jaws effect:’ look it up.

http://articles.sun-sentinel.com/2010-10-31/news/fl-endangered-sharks-20101030_1_nurse-shark-bull-shark-tiger-sharks

http://www.nova.edu/ocean/ghri/forms/news-shark-diver-magazine-from-the-jaws-of-extinction.pdf

I am sick of repeating myself: any story you will experience you will take something away from it. Do it more and more and you will take more and more away without you having a goddman say in it.

Sigh…

 
Leave a comment

You can use the following bbCode
[i], [b], [img], [quote], [url href="http://www.google.com/"]Google[/url]

Leave a Reply

PC Gaming Calendar 2014

Follow Games.on.net

YouTube

Steam Group

Upcoming Games

Community Soapbox

Recent Features
Coming Soon: September

Coming Soon (September 2014): Things are starting to heat up

With big names like Destiny and The Sims, and a couple great RPGs, September is looking good.

Shadow Realms

Can BioWare pull off digital D&D? We go hands on with Shadow Realms

BioWare's Jeff Hickman tells us what rules can be bent and what can be broken.

Dragon Age Inquistion

I Hope There Aren’t Any Straight Characters in Dragon Age: Inquisition

I'm no bigot, but I have to get this off my chest.

Streaming Radio
Radio Streams are restricted to iiNet group customers.

GreenManGaming MREC

Facebook Like Box